I’ve had the pleasure of corresponding with an amazing young woman. A brilliant young woman, Wendi Lubin recently received high honors by the Dean of her college. She’s been through so much for a person her age but has risen above to be more than an overcomer.
The myth expects one to believe her life is ruined and of no value after rape, especially with a child resulting from that rape. Myths are being busted wide open and Wendi leads in example. What Motherhood Means To Me echos the voice of countless mothers of children conceived in rape.
She is strong, beautiful, and determined, fully engaged in being a mom and having a wonderful life. Contrary to society’s beliefs it is her daughter that drives Wendi’s determination to succeed. She fought for her own life and the life of her daughter. There’s no giving up now.
“I never associated my unborn baby as being responsible.”
A relative raped her and family pressured her to abort. But Wendi says, “This was not a tough decision for me…I was already beginning to bond deeply with the unborn child I was carrying.” I’ve noticed when women realize the baby they are carrying is their baby, not responsible for the heinous crime, there is freedom to love.
Filled with emotion remembering my own mom’s love for me after gang rape, I read Wendi’s words through my tears. There are many strong mothers coming out of hiding to fight the stigma. Each year more and more emerge strong because of the strong examples before them.
Please help us end the continued trauma caused by the myths. Share this story and the rest of the stories we have on CHOICES4LIFE.org Moms are to be protected and empowered while their children should be loved. No exceptions. Wendi’s words just may be the much needed truth you or someone else you know needs, so share liberally.
My daughter lives with me.
My daughter plays with me.
My daughter cooks with me
My daughter eats with me.
My daughter sings with me.
My daughter dances with me.
We do everything together, we know each other more than anyone else.
Our bodies, our souls, and our lives are sealed together with a bond that can never
My daughter works out with me.
And sometimes my daughter sleeps in the same bed with me (even though she has her own room).
My daughter is my best friend, is the greatest gift God could have ever given me.
My daughter is the most beautiful creation of God that I have ever laid eyes on.
My daughter is the highlight of my existence.
Long after I am gone, she will be my legacy. My flesh and an extension of my life.
I would go to the ends of the earth to protect my daughter.
My daughter is an extension of my soul, a creation of my womb,
a depth of my flesh and blood. The same blood runs through our veins.
The same DNA goes through our bodies as we take each breathe.
Her face is a copy of mine.
When I look into her eyes, I see my youthful spirit. Her smile reminds me of pure innocence.
There is not a single thing in the world that money can buy that I would not give my daughter.
However my love for her is the fiber of my being that goes more deeper than any sort
of gift I could give her. Not Diamonds, Not Gold, Not Ivory could ever express this everlasting
The day I felt her in my abdomen, to the day she came out the birth canal, to the day
either of us shall leave this earth, I have committed myself to being the best mother
I am capable of being. I am committed to my responsibilities no matter how difficult,
how tasking, or how hard.
I shall never abandon her on her darkest days. I will discipline and rear her with patience,
guidance and love.
For essentially my daughter is a part of me. To harm her would be harming myself and the
Divine creator God.
It is an honor to be her mother, every single day of the year for all of eternity.
When people call her my twin, and say how we have such identical mannerisms,
and identical facial expressions, I am filled with pride and joy that can not be expressed.
She is my baby, who one day will be a woman who has her own baby.
I hope she feels the same pure divine love when she too looks into her own child’s eyes.
Knowing I have her makes even the hardest days more easy to bare.
I give her all my wisdom and I would gladly give my life for her.
Every time she says “Thank you Ms. Mommy , I love you”.
I know I did one thing right in this world.
And yes she calls me Ms. Mommy or Mommy Wendi or Sweetheart.
My Thanksgivings, My Christmas, My Birthdays and every single day on earth is much better now
that I have her. I cherish all of our moments together, and I thank God I am able to experience
motherhood on this dimension.
I will always be the mother to Valencia Marie, that I never had. I was not fortunate enough to have parents.
But I want all my children to know that until the end of time they will have a committed mother in me.
As I have more children in the extended future, My love tank will overflow with even more abundance
for these little souls that I am tasked with giving life, giving birth and giving all of my love.
For now I write and I hope one day she reads my writings and love letters to her and knows who
I am, who I was and my true feelings about her.
She recently had show and Tell at her school. Standing in a room filled with 4 year olds, and having
my daughter introduce me as her “show and tell”, and saying telling her class room I am her mom,
was perhaps the best moment of my life outside of giving birth. Wendi Lubin